CAN U DISCARD??

As a kid, I grew up just like most of us, regularly admonished by my father for my poor maintenance of my books and stuff. And the one thing I always found quite difficult every time I did the repair work was to churn off the unwanted things. The decision making of whether a thing falls under the category of ‘wanted’ or ‘unwanted’ seemed to be a herculean task. I still remember the advice my father gave me years ago that “the ability to discard the unwanted and retain the wanted takes one closer towards success”. Today, I understand the value of this wisdom and the inherent meaning in what he meant.

Have you ever noticed someone telling, “I don’t know why, but one can never expect to get a “yes” out of his mouth for the first time”? I first learnt about this phenomenon in a book on Psychoanalysis by Ian Craib. In his analysis of the human mind and its reactions, Craib takes a look at the theory put forth by Freud in the 1980s. He explains Id to be something inside that can push in one direction or the other against our will, something that is beyond our control and that reassert itself against all attempts to control or divert it. In much more conceivable terms, one can understand Id to be the immediate temptation to deny an offer which is made (though you would have always loved to have had it), the tension and its effects, or in a deeper sense even the tendency to cut or kill oneself. Basically, these are reactions to the mind’s desire to find immediate solutions to internal problems and its attempt to find a reason for it in the outer world.

Another aspect worth considering in this context is the mind’s inertia against change. In our day to day life, we would have observed our tendency to sit in the same seat in the classroom, restaurant or train, prefer the same costumes, same food etc. All these are refusals of the mind to change, in a way similar to the concept of Id mentioned above. The mind places itself in a comfortable cage in all these conditions. A failure to break from these shackles spells failure on a long term.

It is important to train the mind to keep away from what I would call the cushion of repetition. The only way to effect this would be to consciously identify our tendency to repeat something and change it. Such an attempt only can make changes an integral part of our life. As far as Id is concerned, again all methods must be employed to prevent it from taking control of our actions, for a healthy person has a clear sense of self and of others and is not subject to inexplicable waves of feeling released by Id. Hence it is all about differentiating the wanted from the unwanted things around and not letting the mind control you with the unwanted things.